(no subject)

post-tags: trans, nonbinary

here's the thing:

exorsexism functions differently than antitransmasculinity and transmisogyny, which is why binary trans people do have privilege over nonbinary people.

exorsexism is based on identity and not/hardly about how you are seen by society. this is because the gender binary has been created to exclude nonbinary genders/gender identities. the gender binary positions two valid options when it comes to gender: (exclusively, fully and always) male and (exclusively, fully and always) female. the gender binary is not about gender roles, as there are plenty GNC men and women whose identity comfortably fits into those categories - gender expression doesn't equal gender. the gender binary is also not the same as cissexism or cisnormativity, as many trans people comfortably fit into one of the two aforementioned options. nonbinaryhood is about identity and realising you're a man after falsely believing you were a woman before is not the same thing. in hindsight, a lot of trans people, binary or nonbinary, actually do realise that they were their gender/gender identity all along. the gendef binary is also not the sams as gender oppositionism (the idea that men and women are exact opposites from one another), as many people who defy that logic comfortably fit into a binary gender. the term exorsexism was coined to refer to an identity-based oppression because that's simply how the gender binary works. there are some people who may be - as much as i hate this term - "collateral damage" of systemic exorsexism (such as binary people using they/them pronouns). but they don't experience exorsexism the way nonbinary people do. nonbinary people are the core target of exorsexism, and the only people who are systemically affected by it. it is quite literally impossible for exorsexism to be about anything else than identity, because in s society that barely recognises nonbinary people, let alone as any sort of comprehensive group, it's basically impossible to exist and be mistaken for nonbinary.

transmisogyny and antitransmasculinity however very much are based on how society sees us. claiming manhood/womanhood or masculinity/femininity when it's "not ours" or being seen as doing so or being seen as "moving away from womanhood/manhood" and many more arr all things that lead to people being subjected to antitransmasculinity or transmisogyny. this is why transmisogyny is not exclusive to transfems and antitransmasculinity is not exclusive to transmascs, but rather they are experienced by transfems and transfeminised people (i.e. people who are regularly seen as transfem), and transmascs and transmasculinised people (i.e. people who are regularly seen as transmasc). transmascs can be transfeminised, transfems can be transmasculinised, nonbinary people can be either, intersex people can be both. it really depends on how an individual is perceived by the world which may vary from person to person because bodies are different. especially as trans and intersex people are often perceived to occupy some sort of visual, physical middle ground of gender expression, it's highly subjective whether a cis person perceives us as transmasc or transfem. we may experience antitransmasculinity and transmisogyny both in the same day, looking the exact same but being perceived by different people. this is especially true for non-cis-passing and GNC trans people. and because they're both based on perception, people like (perisex) afab demigirls or (perisex) amab nonbinary guys absolutely need to be included in those discussions as well, because they're still seen as moving away from cis manhood/womanhood, and, due to exorsexist ideas, often assumed to be moving towards the other binary gender. there's some "collateral damage" here too, where some cis perisex people are seen as transmasc or transfem, but never to the extent or as frequently as trans and intersex people.

experience of transmisogyny and antitransmasculinity are also different depending on your identity though. i know that my experience with antitransmasculinity is different from transmascs and trans men as someone who doesn't identify as either, and i know that my experience with transmisogyny is different from transfems and trans women as someone who doesn't identify as either. not just because people who transmasculinise or transfeminise me are misgendering me and erasing me, but also because it just feels different to be mistreated for your actual identity rather than a constant misperception of who and what you are, because at least i have somewhat of a chance to brush certain things off because i don't actually identify as masculine/feminine or male/female.

it's also important to note that neither-transmasc-nor-transfem nonbinary people being subjected to antitransmasculinity, transmisogyny or even both is rooted in exorsexism and the erasure of nonbinary gender identities, because we're always effectively misgendered in being transmasculinised or transfeminised when we're not, because people think if we're "moving away" from our AGAB, we must be moving towards the other binary gender because there are only two options.

now you might be thinking: what about binary trans people who experience both transmisogyny and antitransmasculinity, who are discriminated against for being seen as "in between"?

let me introduce you to misandrogyny, the hatred of androgyny and people perceived as androgynous, regardless of their actual identity. misandrogyny affects all kinds of trans people across the board, as well as intersex people.

exorsexism functions in similar ways to bimisia: both are based on not fitting a binary, either the gender binary or the gay/straight binary, both are based on supposedly occupying some kind of middle ground between the two that's seen as not real, both nonbinary and mspec people are seen as not trans/gay enough while still experiencing the full blast of transmisia and homomisia, both exorsexism and bimisia are deemed not real and seen as "misdirected transmisia/homomisia", both are mainly identity-based and rarely on other factors, both nonbinary and mspec people face significant erasure and misgendering/mislabelling, both identities are seen as a phase and a stepping stone towards "the real deal" and so much more. and the conversations around exorsexism and bimisia also sort of mirror each other, with mono gays refusing to acknowledge that being mono and not experiencing bimisia is a privilege, and binary trans people refusing to acknowledge that being binary and not experiencing exorsexism is a privilege and both groups complaining about supposedly being lumped in with straight/cis oppressors. both exorsexism and bimisia are erased because people think nonbinary people are only oppressed for not being cis and mspec people are only oppressed for not being straight, when we are specifically oppressed for being nonbinary or mspec on top of being (seen as) gay or trans. both identities are seen as "only queer because they're not cis/straight" while the inherent queerness of not being binary and being attracted to multiple genders is erased and our identities are flattened to conform with binaries as much as possible. both exorsexism and bimisia are identity-based because there's always this idea that if we simply stopped insisting to be nonbinary or mspec, no one would actually mistreat us. we are mistreated because we disrupt binaries and assert an identity outside of it. both nonbinary and mspec identity is seen as inherently more of an ideological choice than being binary trans or mono gay is. binary trans and mono gay identities are seen as inherently more genuine whereas nonbinaryhood and mspecness are seen as people just trying to be "extra".

and i would like to explicitly state that when i talk about privilege here, it's not the same as actually having the power to oppress, i am merely talking about the privilege of not experiencing a certain kind of oppression, and to be taken more seriously etc. binary trans people don't have power to oppress nonbinary people, but they do have the privilege of not experiencing exorsexism, they do have the privilege of cis people being more likely to listen to them, so it's important to acknowledge that privilege so that you can use it responsibly to be an ally to your nonbinary siblings and not do a Buck Angel on us.